Yesterday afternoon, I talked to my EX............
I called his girlfriend at work (they work together.) I asked her if she knew what was going on with my EX. She asked what do you mean. I told her that he is driving by my house at 2am and he has a problem with me dating...... She said I would have to take that up with him. I told her I thought that she could enlightened me but that was ok. And I said goodbye......
So she had called him because he called me about it........
I let him have it. He jumped around the questions, but we talked. He said that he did not mind me dating. It is where I am meeting men and stay out late. So, I asked him, Where should I meet men? He said, "Friends, at church." I told him (because of how things are) at work. I told him Sorry but he deserved that.... but he did say Yes.... Can you believe that....
But I did tell him that this was nothing of his business. Who I date, Where I date, or how I date...... He said if it affects my kids it does. I told him. How about the beginning when I was asking for him not to have his girlfriend around the kids. But NO you had her around them...... I have accepted that, but I wonder how my kids really feel about it. Real Feel about that.......
For me, I am respecting my kids, I will not have a guy around them till I know the guy will be good to my kids.......
There was so much that was said. I did tell him that Christmas day, our baby girl was really sad. I told him how she acted. How it was hard on us. How this was what we had to deal with. And I could not deal with it. I had to get support from my friend, but we did have Christmas Dinner. In the end, We were there for each other......
We were both glad that Christmas was over......
What pissed me off was.
I hung up on him.....
He called me back and told me he needed to tell me something......before I talk to our baby girl and it backfires on me.....
He said that when he asked our baby girl to move in with him in the beginning. she said NO. So, I asked him when he told that she was thinking about it. He lyed to me......
He would not answer he was jumped around the question once again......
I kept asking him but could not get him to one YES, but he did say that in the beginning she said no. She did not want to move in with him.......
So he must of talk her into thinking about move in with him....... WHAT A JERK.......
I still need to talk to my baby girl.....
till next time.....
BRIN
Ok... here's my 2 cents worth... Don't let your daughter's discomfort at you dating stop you completely. I agree with cutting it back to when they are with their dad but accepting you dating is a big step in accepting that life is not going back to the way it was. Please don't hide your dating from your kids (although I completely agree with not introducing them to guys unless it is serious) or I fear you will end up in the situation I am in with Mark, he's been divorced almost 5 years his son is in limbo, he has never moved past the point your kids are now. Nathan (Mark's son) thinks anytime now life will go back to the way it was before the divorce because (to his knowledge) neither parents have moved on with their lives. Dating is one way you show your kids life will go on and you all will be happy again some day. As for the ex, screw him! Ok... there my 2 cents. I feel for you!!
ReplyDeleteJennifer
It looks like you are standing up for yourself, giving your opinion, what you feel should happen, while still keeping your children first. You need to be able to talk to your daughter, openly and honestly, validate what she feels, and discuss. To her, what she feels is very real, and maybe she feels threatened by another man coming into your life and taking time away from her...whatever she feels, she feels. Seems like a lot of what she feels is what her dad is putting into her head. Good luck!
ReplyDeletexoxo ~Myra
No you need a court order stating she is to live with you bottom line!!!! Good for you with the girlfriend, you are finally getting yours!!!!!! You know that made her mad what you said to her, she will never show you that however, but you know!!!!! :0) Ahhh these seperate parent situations are so frustrating, I see it everyday at work. I will try to help you with a "parenting plan" if you would like to set up visitation equally between the both of you. I will email my ideas!
ReplyDeleteDaniella
yes talk to her and dont trust him. men sya they dont care if you date mine did too but in court first thing he said was she is seeing another man. The judge said sir arent you the one who left your wife for antoehr woman!!!!!!!!!! I htought the judge and bailiff would fall over laughing
ReplyDeleteHe has no right to tell you how to live your life after what he did, and how he did it.
ReplyDeleteStay Strong
Ellen
hey brin, hang in there....why is he trying to take your kids? if he was in the wrong...why doesnt he just move on with that new girl... and by the way you look hott...LOL* in the photo you have on your journal Andrew D.E.
ReplyDeleteHmmmm.... He needs to grow up Brin! You are doing a wonderful job... you are growing so much! I wish Christmas could have been better for you but the first one is always the hardest... Why is your ex out at 2am anyway? What does he say to his girlfriend.... I would be sooo mad if I was her! Must feel kinda good after all she has done to you - [Did I say that? What was I thinking....]
ReplyDeleteHugs with Love,
Kendra