I received this email today, and I would like to share it.
Twenty years ago, I drove a cab for a living. When I arrived at 2:30
a.m., the building was dark except for a single light in a ground floor
window.
Under these circumstances, many drivers would just honk once or twice,
wait a minute, and then drive away.
>
>
>
But I had seen too many impoverished people who depended on taxis as their only means of transportation. Unless a situation smelled of danger, I always went to the door. This passenger might be someone who needs my assistance, I reasoned to myself.
>
>
>
So I walked to the door and knocked. "Just a minute", answered a frail, elderly voice. I could hear something being dragged across the floor.
>
>
>
After a long pause, the door opened. A small woman in her 80's stood
before me. She was wearing a print dress and a pillbox hat with a veil pinned on it, like somebody out of a 1940s movie.
>
>
>
By her side was a small nylon suitcase. The apartment looked as if no
one had lived in it for years. All the furniture was covered with sheets.
There were no clocks on the walls, no knickknacks or utensils on the
counters. In the corner was a cardboard box filled with photos and glassware.
>
>
>
"Would you carry my bag out to the car?" she said. I took the suitcase
to the cab, then returned to assist the woman.
>
>
>
She took my arm and we walked slowly toward the curb.
>
>
>
She kept thanking me for my kindness. "It's nothing", I told her. "I
just try to treat my passengers the way I would want my mother treated".
>
>
>
"Oh, you're such a good boy", she said. When we got in the cab, she
gave me an address, and then asked, "Could you drive through
downtown?"
>
>
>
"It's not the shortest way," I answered quickly.
>
>
>
"Oh, I don't mind," she said. "I'm in no hurry. I'm on my way to a hospice".
>
>
>
I looked in the rear-view mirror. Her eyes were glistening. "I don't have any family left," she continued. "The doctor says I don't have very long."
I quietly reached over and shut off the meter.
>
>
>
"What route would you like me to take?" I asked.
>
>
>
For the next two hours, we drove through the city. She showed me the
building where she had once worked as an elevator operator.
>
>
>
We drove through the neighborhood where she and her husband had lived
when they were newlyweds. She had me pull up in front of a furniture
warehouse that had once been a ballroom where she had gone dancing as a girl.
>
>
>
Sometimes she'd ask me to slow in front of a particular building or
corner and would sit staring into the darkness, saying nothing.
>
>
>
As the first hint of sun was creasing the horizon, she suddenly said,
"I'm tired. Let's go now"
>
>
>
We drove in silence to the address she had given me.It was a low
building, like a small convalescent home, with a driveway that passed under a portico.
>
>
>
Two orderlies came out to the cab as soon as we pulled up. They were
solicitous and intent, watching her every move. They must have been expecting her.
>
>
>
I opened the trunk and took the small suitcase to the door. The woman was
already seated in a wheelchair.
>
>
>
"How much do I owe you?" she asked, reaching into her purse.
>
>
>
"Nothing," I said
>
>
>
"You have to make a living," she answered. "There are other passengers,"
I responded. Almost without thinking, I bent and gave her a hug. She
held onto me tightly.
>
>
>
"You gave an old woman a little moment of joy," she said.
>
>
>
"Thank you."
>
>
>
I squeezed her hand, and then walked into the dim morning light.
Behind me, a door shut. It was the sound of the closing of a life
>
>
>
I didn't pick up any more passengers that shift. I drove aimlessly
lost in thought. For the rest of that day, I could hardly talk. What
if that woman had gotten an angry driver, or one who was impatient to end
his shift?
>
>
>
What if I had refused to take the run, or had honked once, then driven
away?
>
>
>
On a quick review, I don't think that I have done anything more
important in my life.
>
>
>
We're conditioned to think that our lives revolve around great moments.
>
>
>
But great moments often catch us unaware-beautifully wrapped in what other may consider a small one.
>
>
>
PEOPLE MAY NOT REMEMBER EXACTLY WHAT 'YOU DID, OR WHAT YOU SAID, ~BUT~THEY WILL ALWAYS REMEMBER HOW YOU MADE THEM FEEL.
Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might
as well dance.
Boy, what a dance I am having..........
but it is my life and it goes on.
I saw my son today. My friend Thelma and her kids had dinner with DJ. Afterwards we took him to the park.
There I took some pictures and played with him.
He did do something that I am so shocked. I was glad that Thelma was there to see it. She saw how DJ is acting. I was embrassed too. This couple came to the park with their son. When DJ for no reason said that these are his pointing fingers. Which he stuck out his middle fingers on both hands; the birds. I was shock and told him not to do that. He said it again that these are his pointing fingers. I grab his hands and told him not to do that. That is not the pointing finger, and it was not nice to point those fingers. He ran from me while yell yes, these are my pointing fingers. I tryed to catch him when he was playing with me going one direction and I would go the other then he would head for the other direction and I would head for the other directions. I finally stopped and said that we were leaving. He did come out to meet me, and I grab him. There I was trying to explain that those are not his pointing fingers and that the index was his pointing fingers. He told me, no that is the number one. I showed him how it was a pointing finger and not the middle one. I asked him why he ran from me. He shrugged his shoulders. I told him that he knows that he did wrong that is why he ran from me. And I kept explaining that he know those are not his pointing fingers, and I did not want him to use those as his pointing fingers. I finally clam him down, and we left. I did talk with my ex when we dropped him. Oh, DJ did say that he learned that from his teacher. I do not believe that. My ex said he learned that from the new kids at headstart. Always quick to blame someone. I told him I could blame his girlfriend girls, but what I look at is him. How I need to teach him and have him learn that it is wrong for him to do that.
More was said but I don't want to get into it.
I wrote him a letter yesterday when I was alone crying. Please let me know what you all think about it.
How you still affect my life. You are so far away and living your life; moving on as I am trying to move on. You know me so well, yet you question things. I am sitting here alone because you question my motherhood. For 17 years all I have been is a mother not knowing if I make the right decision but I try my best. I put our children first before me. Wanting the best for them, try to raise them with good morals and values, teaching them the beauty of life, yet that there are bad times too. But as long as we are together; life goes on. Yet I sit here alone because you affected my motherhood. You do not know how much you have hurt me. How much I miss our children. How I long for them. Yet you question my motherhood. If anyone would know me it would be you, but yet you question. My girls are more than half way to be on their own; still making decision that will affect their lives. I am still here for them even though they do not want so much of me. You know that too.
<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />
It will be a long while before I forgive you. I will never forget but I will one day forgive you. I am not a person to hold things. I believe you knew that of me. There is a lot that you did not know of me which I have found now that I am on my own. Before all this happen, I was going to switch the weekend with you. I did see how things were for you. How it was affecting you and the kids. How you need to move on with your life to be happy as I am trying. I want you to see how life can be; how to enjoy life beside work. I can’t give you that right now because of how you been to me. How could you have done this to me? I am so much missing our children; more our son because he needs me. He is still young and needs his mother. I sit here crying for him; wanting to hold him, yet I can’t see him without someone present. His mother and I can’t even hold him right now. I want you to know how deep this is affecting me, and this was all you doing.
TILL NEXT TIME.......
